| |
| |
|
Dating Information |
|
|
|
Should You Go on a Dating Hiatus?
Sometimes we need a hiatus from dating. A "hiatus" is a break in
something that normally has continuity. You may have heard this term
used in conjunction with television shows: "The show is going on hiatus
until shooting starts for next season." That means the actors and crew
are taking a break until work starts again. The Brick Wall You've gotten yourself in a rut. You keep doing the same things to meet new people but every relationship just peters out and goes nowhere. You're starting to feel so frustrated that's it's affecting your relationships with family and friends. You're just grumpy and negative much of the time. You're losing hope of ever finding someone to love and becoming cynical and sarcastic about your future. Instead of moving forward you're going into a tailspin. Before you let this state of mind deteriorate into a full-blown depression, there is something you can do to change it: go on hiatus! If you're on a losing streak and it keeps getting worse instead of better, then do what any smart coach does for a player in that situation. Take yourself out of the game for a while. Break the Pattern This is the time when you are most motivated to find a connection to God or Spirit or Higher Power or whatever you call the unseen force that created our world. This is the time when you are most open to learning a new way to think and a new set of principles to believe in and live by that will take you out of your misery and put you back in charge of your life. If this is where you are today, don't beat yourself up because you haven't found the love relationship you so ardently desire. Even the best boxer in the world sometimes has to go down for the count before he can get back up and start fighting again. Give yourself a break and take a break from the dating scene. Going On Hiatus Now's the time to take that class you've been meaning to take, start going to church, find a therapist or counselor or support group. Read a book or two about spiritual principles, study the bible or other scriptures that interest you. Go back to your religious roots or explore some different philosophy that intrigues you. Try a yoga or meditation or dance class. Take the hours and hours you used to spend online at the dating sites and invest them into yourself instead. Before I met my husband I took a two year dating hiatus and did just what I'm suggesting you do. That's why I know it works. What a relief it was to get myself out of the mindset of most singles: "looking, looking, always looking." I pulled in my "singles antenna" that was always on the lookout for any man that might be a possibility. I stopped making decisions about whether to go to any event based on how many single men might be there. I accepted my state of singleness and enjoyed all the good things about it. Making Changes Also, I came to realize that holding on to resentments from the past can block you from attracting good things into your life today. Learning to release bitterness and resentment is a necessary step, but one that many people are unwilling to take. If you are having difficulty finding and keeping a good partner today, chances are there's some anger over a past hurt buried in you that's part of the cause. You don't have to "forgive" and pretend that whatever they did wasn't wrong, but unless you release those angry feelings, and stop giving them your attention, you'll never be free of their influence. Doing this emotional work may not be much fun and you may resent the fact that you even have to do it! But if you have the courage you can find a way and it will make a tremendous difference in your next relationship. I can vouch for that. When I was secure in the knowledge that I am enough and don't need anyone else to be happy then I was able to go back into dating and attract a great mate in less than a year. Turns out that the solution to the problem was within myself. Once I released my old resentments and learned to appreciate all the good things about my life, I attracted some really good men into my life. Now I'm happily married a man who is a perfect partner for me. This dating hiatus idea may seem too radical and extreme to you right now. However, the more people you date and the more unhappy you get, the more it will start to make sense to you. If all you do is take a break for a while, but don't do anything to make needed changes within yourself during that time, then you can't expect to get better results when you start dating again. A dating hiatus works only if you work it! How Long? Does this sound impossible for you right now? If you can't stand the thought of not having a date for six months, then you are in a precarious state of mind, depending way too much on being in a relationship to make you feel okay. A dating hiatus could be just what you need, but you may not be ready to accept that yet. It requires patience and the determination to stick with it for however long it takes. In our culture of instant gratification and the quick-fix, people don't like hearing this, but it is the truth. Let these ideas sink in and roll around in your subconscious for a while. Few people will joyfully jump up after reading this and shout, "Yes, I'm going on a dating hiatus tomorrow!" Give it some time and when the time is right for you (or when you are sufficiently miserable and frustrated), you will know. When it's done with the right motivation, a dating hiatus along with some personal growth work can be your ticket to a better future. You'll go back into the dating game with a real possibility of winning next time. Barbara Wright Abernathy, Modern Goddess, speaker and workshop leader is the author of Venus On Top: Women Who Are Born To Lead And The Men Who Love Them. Get a free report from Barbara, "3 Biggest Mistakes People Make While Dating" at http://www.venusontop.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Dating - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Online Dating - How To Avoid Faked Photos One of the great things about online dating is the ability to read the profiles of hundreds of people in the peace and quiet of your own home. You can scan for key interests and age groups in perfect anonymity without expressing your preferences "in public". 10 Important, Easy Dating Rules to Ensure Your Success 1) Leave the mobile phone off! Do not answer it if it is on Silent either. You should only do this if you are expecting an emergency and I mean an emergency. Online Dating Safety - Tackling Internet Crime Online dating is a great way to contact and meet new people. Either for free or for a small fee you can have access to thousands of singles looking for love. Using the Internet as a Method for Adult Dating In this day and age, many find it hard to find someone that can share their passion and love with. With so many people experiencing a hard time with relationships and many have gone through failed affairs, a multitude have given up and just moved on. Three Keys to Wonderful Dating Experience Forget the flowers and the scent. To improve your chances of both finding a date and then having a really wonderful dating experience, probably here are three key dating tips that start at home. Blind Date Very few singles have ever gone through life without having a friend, relative or coworker try to set them up on a blind date. While a blind date is sometimes referred to as a 'first impression' date, people shouldn't associate so much pressure with a blind date. Pick-Up Lines That Work Most pick-up lines don't work because they are trite, cheesy, and closed-ended statements. Others don't work because of their overt sexual overtones. A Revolution Has Come To Online Dating There is truly a revolution going on in the online dating services industry. And it is one that is far overdue. 10 Keys to Getting Along With Single Women For Successful Dating, Seduction 1. When with a woman on a date, under no circumstances whatsoever, look at and flirt with other women. Dating Tips: Creating The Perfect Atmosphere Had you ever been in the situation where your heart suddenly beats so fast, losing your ability to think, having the sudden loss for words when seeing someone you admired? At that very moment, you were like frozen in time, lost into another world, a world so wonderful, so heavenly? Hmm? How's my description? Ha whatever, the fact is that at that very moment, you were totally defenseless. So defenseless that anything could have just hit you. Married and Unhappy ... Married women need to feel Love and Married men need to be desired by their partners period !! Put more love into your Life.. Online Dating - Is Music the Food of Love? "If music be the food of love, play on". So said William Shakespeare in one of his most famous theatrical lines. Dating On The Internet Is Growing! See How Online Dating Can Help You Find Available Singles Today Dating on the Internet is growing rapidly year after year, because it has become very difficult for most people to meet quality singles in their local communities and find compatible matches!When it comes to meeting new people, we tend to create an urgency, and we put a large amount of stress on ourselves to unite with someone quickly, without taking the time to really get to know the person and see their true qualities.Where sometimes you just don't have all the answers on a date, the first thing you need to ask yourself is, what are you looking for?Are you looking to have fun and meet a variety of people on a casual basis, or do you want to seriously establish a relationship, which can eventually turn into a love match? The decision is yours!In the first meeting it's all about honesty, which most of us throw out the window on the first date! I know you heard it before, but it's true! As you begin the matchmaking process through different dating avenues, you will make your life so much simpler if you're totally honest with yourself and the person you're with. Have You Lost That Loving Feeling? Would you like to discover Easy and Creative ideas to enhance & create romance ! Regain that In love feeling , that you once shared.. Choosing an Online Dating Service The task of choosing the best dating site to join can seem daunting at first with the thousands of possibilities out there. Yet making that choice is perhaps easier than you think. Healing the Midlife Love Crisis All I wanted was to fall in love and live happily ever after. The End. Online Dating Dating has become easier for everyone due to the emergence and success of online dating websites. You can choose the site that suits you best, look for people who have the features you desire along with common interests and contact them immediately. Dating Advice: Common Interest Results in Happy Marriages How often do your married friends complain about husbands who spend weekends on the couch watching games? Did they not notice these guys were sports fanatics while they were dating? Did they think things would change after the wedding?Life is fraught with ups and downs, so it's critical to marry someone you can have fun with, today and fifty years from now. Here's how you can find that person:1. How To Make A Lasting Impression How many times have you felt the urge to impress a girl you've just met ? I'm talking about the kind of burning need that you feel, the compulsive urge that tells your brain that you've got to impress this girl at any cost; the kind of impression that leaves your imprint in her mind. Catch my drift ???For starters, you've got to be well groomed; appearance plays an important role in the formation of first impression. Dating After Divorce: Things To Think About Regarding Dating After Divorce Dating after divorce is a much debated topic due to the psychological and emotional impact it can have on people. Dating after divorce can be complex, too often divorcees don't consider the ramifications of dating after divorce before they jump into it with both feet!If you're going to start dating again after you've gotten a divorce, there's quite few things that you should consider beforehand.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2008 |
